Pumpkin Ice Cream Story Is Here..Aisle 12

I was listening to American Top 40 not too long ago, the one with Casey and not Ryan and I heard the following long distance dedication that made me chuckle and cry.

Casey Kasem spoke: And now for our long distance dedication. It is from a man to his new bride about the cost of living, pumpkin ice cream and an incident that we can all enjoy and learn from if we are newly married, like ice cream, love pumpkins, or just hate the cost of living... He writes

Dear Casey, I am recently happily married. However before I was married I lived a very sheltered life with my mommy and daddy in their home and under their lock and key. I was living in the womb for the first quarter century of my life..As far as I knew, the laundry once placed in the hamper was magically cleaned by the next morning, and food seemed to replenish and multiply by itself in the fridge or pantry. Mommy did all the shopping and cleaning, and daddy did all the work around the house. This allowed me free time to learn about sports, watch sports on TV, and hone my sport talking skills until they were mad good.

Sadly however, that all ended after I got married. Since my wife worked like I do, I found myself coming home to empty food banks and dirty laundry. Try as I might to blink like Jeannie, the food never appeared like it did at my parents house, and the laundry never cleaned itself..I was hitting a low point in my life..or at least I thought..That brings me to the incident..

It was perhaps the coldest night of the winter season. The wind chill brought the temps down to a remarkable -20 degrees. I warmed the car up and my wife and I drove off to the grocery store to stock the house. Shopping was going on as it normally did until we hit the taxable merchandise section of the store..My wife began picking up strange products that I have never purchased in my life..Things like hair products, lotion, deodorant, makeup, PRODUCTS that men do not use, hair spray etc... As she tossed each item into the cart I immediately picked each item up, held it to the light and began to add up this insane wallet killing spree.. I added up each item in my head and began to realize we were hitting my ceiling trigger of spending..I inquired if it was items that we really needed. With each question I asked I got the affirmative response that I did not want to hear. I began to sweat. The spree continued. It was not stopping, it would never stop..But I knew it was up to me to make it stop..We then turned our carts to the left and headed into the frozen food section. Although chilled from the frightful weather outside, her face lit up and the area grew warm. She turned to me and screamed..Edy's Pumpkin Ice Cream..I LOVE PUMPKIN ICE CREAM..Its only out for a limited time. As fragile as the dew on a leaf in the morning of a heat wave..We have to get this...there is only one left...She extended her frozen little hands and arms into the ice coffin and pulled out the last gallon..she hugged it, kissed it, and then softly placed it in the top part of the cart. The part where you put your kid if you have one, or place your fragile purchases like eggs and grapes. We began to move on but I told her that I had to get something out of my shoe. She smiled and moved to the next aisle..I began to adjust my shoe but when she disappeared, I wiped the frost off the door and read aloud the price of the Pumpkin Ice Cream. $6.79 a gallon..WHAT WHAT....I was in a panic. What to do what to do.. I decided to not say anything and just go with the flow..Or at least that is what I wanted everyone to believe. Now it was time to go...We unpacked the 5 carts we had, and paid our bill. We braved into that dark cold night and made our way home.

Once home we began to unpack the groceries..My wife was excited to have a bowl of her pumpkin ice cream. Little did she know. Once all the groceries were unpacked she asked if I put the ice cream away..I said no I thought you did..She frantically checked the freezer, and all the empty bags on the counter and floor..No pumpkin ice cream. Where is it she asked? I said I do not know...and as the next words slipped from my mouth, I saw my world begin to shrink...Why not check the car, maybe it fell out..But it is cold outside, can you go check? No, its not my expensive ice cream..So she began to put on her cold weather gear..She headed out into the dark and cold...My mind began to race..What have I done...What do I say...When she was packing the bags and not looking at me unload the cart, she did not see me hide the ice cream under the belt over hang where they put the hand baskets...I hated the expensive ice cream so much I did not even care if it melted and spoiled. She came back in..short of breath from the cold from being out there for so long searching for ice cream that would never be found..she was frantic...She asked me what happened to it..I told her I did not know..Lets check the receipt to see if they rang it up..They did not, I knew that. I never let on..I showed her that it was never rung up and blamed the woman who rang us out as an incompetent boob. She was sad but I felt I won a victory for every man out there..My plan had worked.

But Casey, it has begun to bother me over the past year and I need to let her know that I am very very sorry..I am praying that one of your listeners hears my pain, goes out and buys Edy's Pumpkin slow churned ice cream for 6.79 and lay it on my door step, to right the wrong I have perpetrated. Casey, can you play Drown, by the Smashing Pumpkins to let her know that I am drowning in guilt over what I have done.

AI Season Finale

We open tonight with perhaps the cheesiest opening of the AI show ever. The two David's dressed as fighters with ring announcer Buffet introducing them...I really do not like this show anymore..Ooops, there is Dillon from 90210 with his kids in the crowd, who happen to be the only people not standing up. He will most likely be promoting 90210 2.0 t0night for FOX.
Ryan coming out getting the crowd going and then introducing the judges...rules for the David's..Three songs, Oh God its a whole boxing theme...Why is Llyod Webber even involved in this..I think he made a pack with the devil to be on this show this season..He is everywhere...They are now brought out again sin boxing outfits..Ryan asks the question how does it feel to be on this stage..David C says you tell me to the crowd and they all cheer because David C is talking to each one individually...Gag me with a spoon..David A says its like a dream come true...Ryan asks the judges what will it take to win..Randy says leave everything on the stage, Paula said soak it up which makes no sense..Simon said have a desire to win and you must hate your opponent..David A says this David C is such a great guy and it has become a love fest... First commercial, nothing but fluff....

Round One...Clive's Round..he picks the song

David C..
1) Still have not found what I am looking for.......U2....I really cannot believe he is in this still..He is the Bono wanna be from center earth..Short little troll...It is just cheesy to see a guy stand at the stage acting like he is a superstar and when he is at best a night light...8....Randy said great song choice but someone has to tell Randy that he did not pick the song...He said it was ok but the note at the end was good...Paula said we found what we are looking for..Simon said you looked tense at the start but when he sang it was phenomenal..

2) Contestant Choice-New Song Dream Big (Amy Shackelton) No idea what song that is...Playing the guitar...Little bubble gum pop song that no one knows..Bad choice..easy and no one knows it....Getting lost in the song..voice at best is OK..7....But come on David..do your stances...Horrible....Randy said....the song was just ok but you were singing your face off...then there was a delayed arrogant little comment from David C,,thank you Randy....Paula said song in your heart and a guitar in your hand and said you took a song that no one knows and made us fall in love with it...Simon said using a boxing analogy it was lightweight..this was supposed to be a winning song and it did not feel like a winning moment...he gave it a 6.5...
3) Contestant choice..World I know...Acoustic, I hate when the come in at the same point in the song..sing one all the way through acoustic...Lame.I know this song, I like this song..I am lost in the song..Until the refrain you do not know what song it is and when he gets to the refrain you see this guy has the weakest voice of any two finalist...Lame..7...so at the end he hits a high note and then steps off and begins to cry...Is this American Cry baby?? Randy said the cool thing about you and said very nice job...Paula said you are standing in your truth and I applaud you David C....Simon said you are one of the nicest most sincere contestants that we have had but it was a wrong song choice..there was debate at the end with Simon but nothing to stop talking to someone about....His comments were a dig at David A who is going to sing Imagine again..He spoke of progression..Point well taken



David A...
1) Don't let the song go down on me...Easy song to sing for him...Sitting down and adding his own take on the song somewhat..He does try to pronounce each word which is weird..9..He won this round....Randy said it does not matter what happens and he said it was the best performance of the season...Paula said she has chills...The sun will never go down on you..whose son??..Simon said he thought last week was ok, but tonight was the best he has done so far...Let me finish...Round one goes to Archuletta....David gave his best OMG TY things with his mouth...So what does David do..Cry..In good old Dave A fashion....
2) In this Moment...Not sure who sings this song either...Good song for him...It is an inspirational song about this moment. Sung well and sung much better than David C......You know his dad picked this song for him because of the message..I never heard a singer at this stage sing you cannot take it away from me...8....Randy said not crazy about the song, but you are in the zone..Paula said it was heartfelt and you are on fire..Simon said he loves the egotistical lyric and it was chosen to showcase that... see my comments above.,,round two to David A...He did the same thing...
3) Imagine....Have to say that I agree with David C..its a crutch...He killed with this song a few weeks ago and if compared to the lame performance that Mr C did this night belongs to David A....9... for singing and a 4 for repeating it again.....Randy said you are so good tonight and you are the best singer..Paula said its the culmination..Simon said we have witnessed one of the greatest finals...Simon said you knocked David C out.

American Idol-Down to 3

Well we are down to three on AI...I am predicting this to be Seyesha's night...Introducing the Judges and Paula looks very very pretty tonight..She is still nutz...tonight the Judges, the singers and the producers have each picked a song to be sung. David Cook coming out with his fake wave and head bob...

David A's song picked by Paula...

1) And So It Goes by Billy Joel...When asked what he thought he said..I was excited its a very pretty song....starting out with no music..Nice choice, but you know they will come in at the middle...He does have a very rich voice....9.....It was a very nice arrangement...I would say it was one of his best performances.....That could be the one that gets it for him...Randy said check it out man you are in the zone to win...Wow what a great critique..Paula said solid..Simon said good and it was not outstanding...

2)With You..Chris Brown...Acting all stunned...He is getting lost in this song...forgetting the words a bit but singing all huffy...and off in parts but then on in other parts...Not sure what to say about this one..Sounds ok...7....Randy said that he did not think it was the right song....Paula said it was perfect...Simon said I applaud you that you did not do a ballad but it was like a Chihuahua trying to be a Tiger...In so much as its not really you...

3) Producers picked Longer by Dan F...Now they have picked a very easy song for him to sing..He some pitch problems at the start, but has settled in to a safe song and he is sitting down and the people in front told to act like groupies are waving their hands, and he hit one high note to let you know that I should win this but overall just blah...7...Randy said you can sing the phone book..hot hot..Paula said it was lovely..Simon you sang it well but the songs and lyrics were horrible...You will be in the finals next week...

Seyesha up next..Randy picked

1) If I Ain't Got You by Alicia...voice seems a little muted...Singing it well for such a diva song..Coming to the crescendo...did a nice job they will say screamy in some parts...9...Randy said you did an amazing job..You are peaking at the right time..Paula said you are beautiful in which she answered in her best ghetto, thanks girl...Simon said you sang that very well but he picked something that you had to sound like the original...Said it was sung very very well...In her interview with Ryan she was very strange...

2) Fever by Peggy Lee....The acting part is hokey, but she is singing the song really well..She is playing the role of the sexy temptress..Song is very well sung but not exciting...8..did a very nice job with tone and pitch...Randy said you sung it well..Paula said she is surprised that she chose this song...Simon said you will regret this because it was a lame cabaret performance.

3) Producers chose...Well not we must pause..now that I have the DVR...Ryan just messed up again and insulted the gay community... We see the gay character from Entourage in the audience, and it must have thrown him because he goes up to two other guys and tells them about Idols on tour and that they can go together or with dates and the audience hushed..he tried to recover saying he knows its Seyesha's dad..what an odd thing...Creepy....Hit me Up....Not sure who sings the songs but she sounds like Beyonce...She is the most marketable of the three..Now the start sounded better than a few runs in the middle..Screamy but over all she did a great job with the song...8....Randy said it was just OK for me..Paula said something about Happy Feet...said you sang the song well...Not the type of song for you...Simon said it was better than the second song...Your best week was last week...

David C...Simon chose

1) First Time Ever I Saw Your Voice...Odd choice and Simon said he wanted to do something original not like Randy....Acoustic, slight Baroque quality..Yes I know what that it is...And they pan to a lone old woman standing during the whole performance...Started off well..Pitchy in the middle..Once again not a very strong voice but that's ok they have equipment to correct that...9....All did well...Wow his dad is old..Gonna be like me if I ever have kids...Randy said it was good but you are a rocker and Simon did you no justice. Paula said something..Simon said it was one of your best performances...round one goes to Cook and Cowel..

2) Switchfoot...Dare you to Move..David playing the guitar...God he creeps and his voice is either cracking because it is flat as all hell... Lower part horrible..Once again we see he can only scream and this voice sucks..I warn each of you out there....If he becomes the next AI we will hear from him as much as we do Taylor Hicks and Bo Bice...6....Randy said great song choice performance wise not good very pitchy....Paula said something and it sounds like he was not listening because she stopped to point out that this pompous little snot would rather check his gear then listen to the ramblings of a crazy woman...Simon said not much more to add...All three of you had an OK round...

3) Last song from David and the cut to Ryan in the faux mosh pit and all the pretty little people..Over Ryan's right shoulder, stage left of course, is a freaky kid..As Ryan does the Itune commercial the kid is doing a fake smile and turning his head and saying yes to everything Ryan is saying in a mocking fashion..I am replaying it and laughing so hard..This has to be the best performance of the night....11....for the fake mosh pit fan...

Singing I dont want to miss a thing...Started off flat...what a weak voice...Lame arrangement...Do not need to see anymore..I want to miss this thing so now he will scream at the end and fireworks will go off, a firetruck will drive through Ben Affleck will wave and a star will explode in the sky..Cheese dick moment alert...but let watch him bow and and genuflect to the crowd..7.....Randy said it was just ok..Paula said see you in the finals..Simon said David Cook wins the nite....Eh...

I really have to stop watching this show and find better use of my time.....

American Idol-The Last Four

Well, in what has to be the most disappointing season to date for AI, we are down to the final 4...At least the year Taylor won, it was more enjoyable....Anyway..

Live with Ryan. I still think that Seyesha has sung the most difficult songs in this competition and has been given no credit....Tonight they are doing inner rock star...A tribute to the rock and roll hall in fame in Cleveland...I guess they are going to sing two song again tonight..

David Cook...Hungry Like the Wolf....He has his dog tags on and leather..He is such an original rocker...You really cannot hear the music tonight..The mic is up and he sounds horrible.....it was bad and short...6....Randy said it was ok and a solid performance..it was OK..Paula said something so off the mark...Simon said it was good, it was copy cat..He has this smugness that would leave one to believe that the judges have already told him do not worry I am going to fix this for you.

Seyesha....Proud Mary...Good choice for her but it could be good...Looks good, and at the start sounds good...during the slow parts...energetic..once again she is doing a tough song..Not as good as the original but not bad..8...Randy said you showed up and are in the zone..Paula said you look like a star and you are something...Magic happens..Simon said it was a bad version of Tina...

There is something really wrong with the music mix tonight...

Jason....Doing Marley..I shot the Sheriff...In a word strange...Reggae light..weak and it I am just confused..I think not much the music thing...see my mind turned to jelly..4... Randy said dude nothing special about it...Paula said you performed to the audience but I was not crazy about the song...Simon said stand back...it was atrocious all around..arrangement and singing was bad...

David....Its a fun song to me..Stand by me...Acting goofy...Once again he sounds good but the song is just not relevant...You are trying to be a pop idol and you are singing this song..singing to the crowd....8...I just do not understand it...Randy said check it out...you are hot...Paula said the same thing that she said to everyone else...something about eyes tonight...Simon said you could have whistled a song and it would have been better than Jason..struggled at the end but best performance so far......at the end he guffawed and huffed a bit.

David....being phony...Baba O'Rielly...Oh David you are so cool...his wam beard going...once again we see the limits of this posers voice..The sad part is his quasi rock moves coupled by his weak vocals and his wanna be attitude and trailer trash couture...7...Randy said something is different going on and I like it..Paula said nothing..Simon said welcome back..I just do not get this...It is a really lame singer

Seyesha...Oh God Rascal Flats..these punks show up for everything...Sam Cooke..A change is going to come...speaking about the civil rights movement..Calculated....Hard song again...She or Jason are going home tomorrow but I do think it is unfair...she has consistently sung hard songs and performed well...She is on key with this song and she is controlling her vocals like a pro..There is no one except David A that has as strong of a voice in this at this point..He lacks soul..The ending was fantastic....9.5.....Randy said...He did not love it...this thing is soooo fixed....this is the reason why he was a lame journey member wannabe...Paula said something and it was actually right... week after week she performs well and each week they tear her down.she is crying now and it must be frustrating for her because she is one of the best two singers left and she is going to go home. Simon said...I have to be fair..I agree with Paula...He said Randy was wrong and that it was sung very well...Oops she is playing the race card and she does not have to cause she has mad talent and talent always trumps race and professionalism...With the DVR I have been replaying it and you can actually see her heart break in the silence between where Randy gave his lame remarks and Paula standing up and boy oh boy did she start balling...She fought back the tears as long as she could...When Simon said what he said she released, lost control of everything..she knows she is going home tomorrow and its not fair...It must feel so cheap to know that you performed better than everyone else and you are not given the free ride..

Jason....Mr Tambourine Man......He forgot the words at the start..too huffy and puffy but it is not a bad..the best way to describe his performance is singing mono in a stereo world...It was ok 7....short song..Randy said you are not in the zone tonight...Paula said it did not blow me away but you did...Simon said pack your suitcase....

David A..Love me Tender...Goofy...This is pretty good..Safe for him though but he is on key and his pitch is perfect...Lacks emotion but sounded good..9.5...Randy said it was hot and the best performance of the night..Paula said it was fantastic..Simon said you did not beat the others you crushed them...

Recap...David Cook is lame...Seyesha shows range....Castro...A mess..Archuletta solid but not relevant...